"The castle grounds snarled with a wave of magically magnified winds," begins a new chapter of Harry Potter written by a machine. It's a three-page chapter, titled "Harry Potter and the Portrait of What Looked Like a Large Pile of Ash". It was generated by Botnik Studios, through a predictive algorithm trained using all seven Harry Potter novels. "We used predictive keyboard trained on all seven books to ghostwrite this spellbinding new Harry Potter chapter," the company said in a tweet.
Here's your link to the story.
https://twitter.com/botnikstudios/status/940627812259696643?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
The chapter starts off strong and then takes a rather…umm…whimsical turn. Harry seems to dislike Ron, according to this story. "To Harry, Ron was loud, slow and soft bird. Harry did not like to think about birds," reads the book.
Well, you can't really blame Harry here. After all, Ron stopped his "frenzied" tap dance the moment he saw Harry. To make matters worse, Ron proceeds to eat Hermione's family, immediately after he saw Harry. WTH Ron!
Things seem to calm down when Hermione threaten aggression. The story shifts to Death Eaters inside and atop the castle. But let us not spoil the whole chapter for you.
Needless to say, the story is funnier than anything J.K. Rowling ever wrote, even though it presumably wasn't meant to be funny. But then, the predictive text program was created by Jamie Brew, who has written for The Onion and Clickhole. You can see more of his work on Tumblr.