# Poor jokes , pj :-)



## anish_sha (Nov 15, 2008)

Hi.. Guys.. Let start a thread for poor jokes..  here goes the first one 

One guy got bitten by a king cobra in his house, but he didn't die why?


Ans : because he was in LIVING room.


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## Edge-of-chaos (Nov 17, 2008)

A man goes to sleep with two glasses of water next to his bed. One full one empty. Why?









One if he's thirsty in the night.  and the other if he's not!


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## amitabhishek (Nov 23, 2008)

Good thread dude!


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## mrintech (Nov 23, 2008)

PJ = Phata Joke, Phaltu Joke, Poor Joke etc. etc. etc. & etc.


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## amitabhishek (Nov 24, 2008)

Why did Chris"topher" Columbus discovered America? Because he went "tofar"


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## krazzy (Nov 24, 2008)

Musst... avoid... this... thread...


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## Desmond (Nov 24, 2008)

Two fishes were in a Tank........one says to the other......





You drive, I'll man the turret (Gun).


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## girish.g (Nov 24, 2008)

Omg.wtf %^*%#^$&


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## BBThumbHealer (Nov 24, 2008)

A Mosquito Died While Listening To The Song " Aap Ki Kashish " ... Why ?




The Song A *Hit* - " The Insect Killer Spray !


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## alter_ego (Nov 24, 2008)

q: Where does Mr. Bean sleep?
a:On Bean bag 

q: What is Mr. Bean's favorite quote?
a:"Bean" there done that.

q:What did Mr. Bean had for breakfast
a:Baked Beans


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## Desmond (Dec 25, 2008)

Q: What is the colour of frequency?
A: Purple

Since, frequency is 1/time i.e. 1/sec
1 sec=1 pal
then 1/sec == per pal =>Purple

If a fat girl crosses you but comes back when you whistle, what will you call the situation?





GOLMAAL returns


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## Count Dracula (Dec 27, 2008)

Lol @ Golmaal Returns.


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## ico (Dec 27, 2008)

Q: Guess the name of Microsoft's new software?
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Ans: M$ Dhoni.


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## azzu (Dec 27, 2008)

really cool Ones
PJ--> Pakao Jokes


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## amitabhishek (Dec 27, 2008)

gagandeep said:


> Q: Guess the name of Microsoft's new software?
> .
> .
> .
> ...


 
He...He funny.

Q: Why did the girl changed her name from Shruti to Shraxis?
A: *Ans: Because UTI bank is now Axis bank.*

​


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## anish_sha (Oct 28, 2009)

more pls...................


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## DarkDante (Oct 29, 2009)

MY kinda thread..sum people even try 2 do me in at skool fur sum of my jokes!Dese r sum starters..tell me if u want more!

Quesne day a lakkadhara(woodcutter)went 2 d city,nd all d girls started 2 follow him and try 2 kiss him!why???
ans:Axe effect
woohoo!
sum more!

one day a eraser opened a matrimonial place.what was it called?
ans:Rubber ne bana di jodi!

if u liking.den jusst asking!


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## vamsi_krishna (Oct 29, 2009)

Person1: What is his name?

Person2: ZooZoo

Person1: Why so?

Person2: Coz.. he escaped from zoo twice.


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## anish_sha (Oct 30, 2009)

Where does a dog go when it loses its tail..?
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(",)

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he goes to th RE-TAIL shop(",)


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## RaghuKL (Oct 30, 2009)

Former Pakistan cricket captain Inzamam-ul-Haq has filed a law-suit against the biscuit manufacturer “Priya Gold”

.. because they used the punch-line- “हक से मांगो!!”


Why is Ekta Kapoor planning to revive Kyunki Saas....?


Ans: She read somewhere that Tulsi can cure Swine Flu


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## azzu (Oct 30, 2009)

wow these Pakao jokes are awesome 
keep comin


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## chesss (Oct 30, 2009)

Question: what do you call a guy who has 9 tanks on the terrace ?

Answer: nau-tanki 

 

Question : why does the lady living in house number 32c always smiling ?

Answer: because she lives in batees-c


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## DarkDante (Oct 30, 2009)

Ques:wht do u call a music channel widout ny presenters,vjs etc...
Ans:EMPTY-v!
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Posted again:
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can we post some 'ahem' jokes?

Ques:a monkey was given a banana,why did'nt it eat it?
ANs:bcoz d banana was made of plastic
Ques:a monkey was given a REAL banana,why didnt it eat it?
Ans:bcoz now d MONKEY was plastic

Ques:hw do you put a elephant into d fridge in 3 steps?
Ans:Simple
1)open d door
2)put in d elephant
3)close d dore!


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## DarkDante (Oct 30, 2009)

how do you put a GIRAFFE into d fridge in 4 steps?
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1)open d dore
2)take elephant out
3)put giraffe in 
4)close d dore!

Ques:dere was a meeting of animals...who was missing?
Ans:d giraffe!he was still in d fridge!

Ques:deres a lake which is home of crocs how dyou cross it?
Ans:by swimming
Ques:but dey will eat u!!hw will u cross?
Ans:deyre at d meeting,doofus!


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## Nithu (Oct 30, 2009)

The following questions were actually posed by real-life lawyers and are taken from official court records.

*lawyer:* What happened then?
*person:* He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me."
*lawyer:* Did he kill you?

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*lawyer:* I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture.
*person:* That's me.
*lawyer:* Were you present when that picture was taken?

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*lawyer:* You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
*person:* Yes.
*lawyer:* And these stairs, did they go up also?

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*lawyer:* All you responses must be oral, ok? What school did you go to?
*person:* Oral.


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## RaghuKL (Oct 31, 2009)

What did the doctor say to the very nervous midget? 
You'll just have to be a little patient!

Q: Who had a double role in movie 'Sholay'?
A: King George 
He is on both sides of the coin

Santa runs home yelling : "Pack your bags Honey, I just won the 10 Million Lotto!"
WIFE: Oh dear! Do i pack for Beaches or Mountains???
Santa: "WHO CARES??? JUST PACK AND GET LOST..."

What do u call a cylinder of radius "z" units and height "a" units?
- Pizza!  
Proof :- Volume of cylinder= Pi * r * r * h
=>pi*z*z* a
=Pizza
Hence Proved.


Why does not Santa wake up early.. i.e. when the day dawns.. or sun rises.. but
instead get up when the sun is already shining bright...

Because he has realised the fact that.. "dawn ko pakadna mushkil hi nahin.. na mumkin hain.."


After hike in petrol price, Santa was not worried at all.
When Banta asked him the reason, he said: "How does it matter? Earlier I was filling petrol for Rs.100 in my car, now also I'll fill petrol for Rs.100 only !!"


Santa ki sister ko daku utha kar le gaye. Logo ne kaha daaku khatarnaak hai - sister ko bachane khali haath mat jana.
Phir kya??

Santa dhai kilo AAM le gaya.


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## sam9s (Nov 4, 2009)

Why did'nt Brook Shields marry James Bond...

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.Coz she didnt want to be named ...*Brook Bond*...


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## static_x (Nov 6, 2009)

Who is "JO"??
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Kambakht Ishq!!!

(remember kambhakht ishq hai JO...)

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What's the name of Sardar who has only one hair?

Iqbal Singh...

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Whats the name of the Sardar who lives under water??

Jal-andar Singh!!!

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Whats the name of the sardar who lives under water and breathes too??

Jal-andar Singh "Gill"!!!!
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2 friends Jo & Wo were going thru jungle. Jo sighted a snake and suddenly Wo died...Why?


JO dar gaya WO mar gaya !!!


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## anish_sha (Nov 19, 2009)

common ... more....


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## azzu (Nov 19, 2009)

man these are damn hilarious


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## RaghuKL (Nov 19, 2009)

An elephant was in love with a she-elephant. But the she-elephant
went and got married to some other elephant. So our elephant was
very depressed. One of his friends felt sorry for him, and took him
to a park to cheer him up. In the park, they sat on a see-saw, but
the see-saw broke. Now, which song would our hero sing?


"See-saw ho ya dil ho, aakhir toot jaata hai."
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Another VERY POOR JOKE
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The headman of a big tribe had a beautiful daughter, who fell in love with a boy who was a poor person. When the people of 

the tribe came to know about their love, they did not like it at all,and so began to protest about it. Now it happened that 

the two lovers left their homes for a happy future.

The people of the tribe started searching for the two lovers but they could not find them. At last,they accepted their 

love and asked them in a newspaper to come back.The people said that if u both come back we will marry u, we accept that u 

loved each other truly. So in this way their love won and the age old attitude of the tribe took a beating.The couple went 

to the city for shopping for the wedding. He was wearing a white traditional dress,and was crossing the road when a car 

came and hit him and he died on the spot.

The girl lost her senses. After a long time she recovered and accepted that her love has died. One night she was sleeping 

in her home with her family. Her mother had dream in which she saw a fairy. That fairy asked her mother to wash the blood 

spots of the guy from her daughter's clothes as soon as possible. But her mother ignored the dream. Next night the father 

saw the same dream, he also ignored it. Then when the girl had the same dream the next night, she woke up and told her 

mother about the dream.Her mother asked her to wash the clothes on which there were blood spots.She washed the spots but some 

remained. Next night she again had the same dream she again washed the spots but some still remained. Next night she again 

had the same dream and this time that fairy gave her last warning to wash the blood spots, else something terrible will 

happen. This time the girl tried her best to wash the spots, the clothes tore, but some spots still remained. In the 

evening on same day when she was alone, someone knocked the door, when she opened the door she saw the fairy at the door. She 

got very scared and fainted. The fairy woke her up..., and gave her an object, That awe-struck girl asked "what is this..? 

to which
the fairy replied : ......"kaise bhi daag ho, jaise bhi daag ho........ Surf Excel hai na..."


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## RaghuKL (Nov 19, 2009)

A wise old man who was a judge, was asked to settle a dispute between two brothers about the fair division of a large estate 

left them by their father.

"Let one brother divide the estate," said the judge," and let the other brother have the first choice in choosing his share."


. A GROUP OF ELEPHANTS WERE SITTING ON THE STREET, A BEAUTIFUL N SLIM FEMALE 

ELEPHANT PASSED BY. WAT DOES DE LOAFER ELEPHANT SAYS ????

WOW .......3600...2400...3600 !!!!!!!


what is the vector form of sridevi????
???
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?

(u must have studied vector algebra to know its answer)


ANS : – TABU!!!!


sridevi did chandni and tabu did chandni bar!!!!


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## dreams (Nov 19, 2009)

awesome ones..keep it flowing guys


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## RaghuKL (Nov 19, 2009)

One day James Bond goes to buy a pan. The pan walla asks him 4 Rs. for the
pan but James Bond gives him only 1.5 rs.
When paan waala asks him for the rest of the money ...
Bond replies ....?????
Dhai (2.5) another day...


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## RaghuKL (Nov 19, 2009)

What does South African cricket fan do after SA wins world Cup?


Turn Off the playstation /pc and go to sleep....


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## DarkDante (Nov 21, 2009)

Wat age was ranbir kapoor in da film"azab prem ki ghazab kahani"?

12.


u Asking how?


well,he did sing"*TERA *hone laga hoon"

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There were 3 cocks(male chickens)
One was normal,Second was abnormal and d third was G@y

On sunrise,First one said"Cock -a-Doodle-Doo"

Second one said"Doodle-a-Cock-oo"

and Third one said...







"Any cock will do!!!!"


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## Krazzy Warrior (Nov 22, 2009)

RaghuKL said:


> A GROUP OF ELEPHANTS WERE SITTING ON THE STREET, A BEAUTIFUL N SLIM FEMALE
> 
> ELEPHANT PASSED BY. WAT DOES DE LOAFER ELEPHANT SAYS ????
> 
> WOW .......3600...2400...3600 !!!!!!!


LOL!


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## CA50 (Nov 22, 2009)

grt man, keep posting


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## RaghuKL (Nov 23, 2009)

why Akshay Kumar’s wife can never be a superstar???
Coz Twinkle Twinkle Little Star..!
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Another one
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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?





















"Robin, get in the car."


A man had six fingers.........people used to call him hanuman.....why???
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.because his name was hanuman........... 


Santa went to Banta's shop to buy a parachute.

Santa: I hope your parachutes always open.
Banta: Well, no one has ever complained of our parachute not opening.

About a century or two ago, the Pope decided that all the Sardars had to leave Italy. Naturally there was a big uproar from the Sardar community.

So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate with a member of the Sardar community. If the Sardar won, the Sardars could stay. If the Pope won, the Sardars would leave.

The Sardars realized that they had no choice. So they picked a middle aged man named Santa Singh to represent them. Santa Singh asked for one condition to be added to the debate. To make it more interesting, the debate was to be conducted using sign language and neither side would be allowed to talk. The Pope agreed.

The day of the great debate came. Santa Singh and the Pope sat opposite each other for a full minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. Santa Singh looked back at him and raised one finger.

The Pope waved his fingers in a circle around his head. Santa Singh pointed to the ground where he sat. The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Santa Singh pulled out an apple.

The Pope stood up and said, "I give up. This man is too good. The Sardars can stay. " An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking him what had happened. The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there was still one God common to both our religions. Then I waved my finger around me to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground and showing that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us from our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of original sin. He had an answer for everything. What could I do?"
Meanwhile, the Sardar community had crowded around Santa Singh. "What happened ?" they asked. "Well", said Santa Singh, "First he said to me that the Sardars had three days to get out of here. I told him that not one of us was leaving. Then he told me that this whole city would be cleared of Sardars. I let him know that we were staying right here." "And then?", asked the crowd. "I don't know," said Santa Singh, "He took out his lunch and I took out mine".

PS. NO OFFENCE MEANT TO ANY SARDARS.


One day, a boy, rose in a computer-professional Info. Tech. family, asks
his Dad, "Daddy, how was I born?"
His Dad thinks for a while, sighs and replies, "Ah, my son, I guess one
day you would have to find out anyway! "

"Well, you see, your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on MSN.
Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We entered into a secure folder, where your mother agreed to a download
from my hard drive.
As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had
used a firewall, but it was too late to hit the Delete button.
Six weeks later, your Mom sent me an instant message saying that her
operating system was showing signs of unauthorized program activity from a
self extracting file which had implanted itself in her operating system.
Then, nine months later, a little Pop-Up appeared and said: 'You've Got
Mail'!"


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## RaghuKL (Nov 26, 2009)

Hope u ppl know sugriv n bali ..(from ramayan)...
if they decide to start a movie production at hollywood ....
wat will be the name of their production ????


wanar brothers


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## RaghuKL (Nov 26, 2009)

(Lion) Ajeet Series OF Jokes:
Robert: boss..is saaleh ka kya karen ?
Ajeet:Ise hamlet poison khilado...sochta rahega, to be or not to be !

Peter: Boss, mere teen bacche hue. Unko kya naam doon?
AJIT: Ek ka naam rakhna Peter, doosre ka Repeater, aur teesre ka Cha Ling Chu.
Peter: Par Cha Ling Chu kyoon?
AJIT: Bewakoof, duniya ka har teesra bacchaa Chinese hota hai!


Raabert: Boss! Aaap ko kaun si teen chiz sabse jahyahda pasand hein boss?
Ajeet: Ek Mona, Doosra Sona, aur Tisra, Mona ke saath Sona

Scene: Ajeet get's hold of his favourite hero & then directs his chela.
Ajeet: Maikal, Is saale ke ek haath mein laal aur doosre haath mein hara
rang laga do.
Maikal: Lekin kyon baas?
Ajeet: Bewakoof, itnaa bhi nahin jaanta? Jab pulice yehaan aayegi to ise
range haathon pakad legi. he he he....


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## RaghuKL (Nov 29, 2009)

Afridi made 100 in 37 balls…
Jayasurya in 48 balls…
Azhar in 64 balls….


But the fastest was made by ‘Dhritrashtra’ ( That too during the time of Mahabharat)
100 with only 2 balls….!!!!!!


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## DarkDante (Nov 29, 2009)

y did inzamam-ul-haq sue priya gold?

bcoz of there motto:HAQ se mango!

(PS:d loafer elephant one has been done to death)

a terrorist throws a bomb into a budhiyas house
everyone sez"budhiya,bomb hai!"
budhiya says"dhat wo to main javani mein thi!"

madam asks everyone 2 write his/her's BF/Gf's name
BAd boys give paper afta 10 mins an say"done maam"
girls say 2 mam:"supplementary please!"

HAHAHAHA lol man!


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## yrana2002 (Nov 30, 2009)

Here's one from an old digit member: 

Once mickey mouse and donald duck were engaged in a fight.. Donald duck overpowered mickey and threw him at the wall. Instantly, mickey mouse started to write Ramayan.......        


....


...



Because he had now become Wall-Mickey (Valmiki)


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## Krazzy Warrior (Dec 1, 2009)

^^ hehe 



ApoCalypse 123478 said:


> a terrorist throws a bomb into a budhiyas house
> everyone sez"budhiya,bomb hai!"
> budhiya says"dhat wo to main javani mein thi!"
> 
> ...


HahahahahahahA! LOL!! dat so ebil man!    supplementary lol


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## RaghuKL (Dec 17, 2009)

Q. What can you never eat for breakfast ?
A : Dinner.

Q. What gets wet with drying ?
A : A towel.

Q. Why is it easy to weigh a fish ?
A : Because it has its own scales.

Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state?
A : Liquid.


Q.How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A.Concrete floors are very hard to crack! remember

Q.If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall,how long would it take four men to build it?
A. No time at all it is already built.  8 men have already built it..

Q.If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A. Very large hands.(Good 1 na?)

Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.

Q. How can a man/woman go eight days without sleep?
A. He/she sleeps at night.

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A. Wet.

Q. What looks like half apple ?
A : The other half. 

Q. What happened when wheel was invented ?
A : It caused a revolution.


Now the time for the worst PJ u'd have come across ........

Q:Chintu's mom has three sons.What is the name of the other two?
A:Chin-1 & Chin-3


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## harryneopotter (Dec 17, 2009)

One day, The Famous Villain Ajeet became Coach for the Indian Cricket team. 
The match was going on between India And SL.
Robert came running to ajeet and asked :
R: Boss boss, SL needs 12 runs off 3 balls, Dilshan is on strike, Ishant have to bowl, so wat should i say to ishant ?
A: Ask him to bowl an off spin delivery !
R: But boss, he is a pacer, and off spin ?
A: Do as i say ! 

Dilshan Caressed the of spinner to cover boundry for a FOUR.

R:  Boss boss, SL needs 8 runs off 2 balls, Dilshan is on strike, Ishant have to bowl, so wat should i say to ishant ?
A: Ask him to bowl a Leg Spin Delivery !
R: But boss .....
A: Do as i say ! 

Dilshan swatted that delivery out of the park for a huge 6.

R:  Boss boss, last ball pe 2 run chahiye, ab kya bolu ishant ko ? (2 runs are needed off the last ball, wat should i say to ishant ?)

A: Ab ishant ko kya bolna hai ? Dilshan ko jaake bolo ki uske Biwi Bacche hamare kabze me hai!!! (Dnt need to say anything to ishant, but tell dilshan that his wife and kids are with us as captives !!)


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