# Boarding School - pros and cons



## reddick (Aug 19, 2015)

Hi Guys ,

 I want to know about reputated boarding school for my son for next year.  He will be 4 yrs. by then. Please suggest preferly in North India region and also mention it's annual fee.
And Is there any other online forum to discuss these issues? If yes, do post their links here. Thanks a lot for your support.


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## SaiyanGoku (Aug 19, 2015)

You're sending your 4 year old kid to boarding school? Isn't the world brutal enough for him already?


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## Hrishi (Aug 19, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

It's too early to send him to boarding school . isn't it ?


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## reddick (Aug 19, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

Well , if he gets admission early in boarding school then he will up come all the boarding chaos and confusions if admitted later. And once he gets in then we, including him,  had not to worry about his overall performance till he cleared 12th standard. 
This may further infuse discipline,sports activities and he would be comfortable in unversity hostel life afterwards .


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## SaiyanGoku (Aug 19, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

I don't think its good for the child to be subjected to hostel life this early from a mental and emotional point of view. People learn whole life and adjust when required. Hostel in college years or even class 11th-12th is justified, not before that.


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## reddick (Aug 19, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

Hmmm everyone has his own point of view. And my family also support the same. 
BTW I'm not here to start a new debate on sending kids to hostel. 
You may ans. my query I have asked


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## nikhilsharma007nikx (Aug 19, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

But thats just bullshit! I offend it. Put him in a normal school, you are better off with that. or dont have him study anywhere. 

PS to mods: Ban me if i offend you. I cant let a person destry a 4yo life.

- - - Updated - - -

Update: If you want to neglect him, why do you even have a son? you said that you wont have to worry about his performance in school! you know what? serious bullshit! im so ****ing angry! why you do this?!


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## reddick (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

[MENTION=2744]nikhil[/MENTION]_Sharma
Why are u so serious about this consideration. I am just planning about this and hav'nt send him yet. We have to scrutinize various facts before the final go. Or the idea may be dropped also.


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## bikramjitkar (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

I agree with [MENTION=146650]nikhilsharma007nikx[/MENTION] . How can any parent even think of sending off their kid who has barely learnt to walk and talk to live among complete strangers? I don't care if this offends anyone, but you might as well put him up for adoption.


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## Anorion (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

uh If anyone has contrarian opinions, start a thread. Else, stick to answering OPs question. Don't give unasked for advice.
There is nothing wrong with boarding school. It's not like he is abandoning his kid, he is doing something good and healthy, in fact giving the best education and you guys are stopping him because of your small minded outdated paranoid primitive beliefs.


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## bikramjitkar (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



Anorion said:


> uh If anyone has contrarian opinions, start a thread. Else, stick to answering OPs question. Don't give unasked for advice.
> There is nothing wrong with boarding school. It's not like he is abandoning his kid, he is doing something good and healthy, in fact giving the best education and you guys are stopping him because of your small minded outdated paranoid primitive beliefs.



And which boarding school guarantees that a 4 year old will be an IIT/IIM grad someday? I'm not saying that boarding schools are bad, but this borders on child abuse. Anyway, I'm out of this thread.


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## anirbandd (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

unasked, free advice: no hostel in school life. yes hostel in college/uni life.


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## Faun (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



reddick said:


> Well , if he gets admission early in boarding school then he will up come all the boarding chaos and confusions if admitted later. And once he gets in then we, including him, * had not to worry about his overall performance till he cleared 12th standard. *
> This may further infuse discipline,sports activities and he would be comfortable in unversity hostel life afterwards .



Looks like you are not too keen to deal with the daily ****.


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## Gollum (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



reddick said:


> Hi Guys ,
> 
> I want to know about reputated boarding school for my son for next year.  He will be 4 yrs. by then. Please suggest preferly in North India region and also mention it's annual fee.
> And Is there any other online forum to discuss these issues? If yes, do post their links here. Thanks a lot for your support.





reddick said:


> Well , if he gets admission early in boarding school then he will up come all the boarding chaos and confusions if admitted later. *And once he gets in then we* , including him, * had not to worry about his overall performance till he cleared 12th standard*.
> This may further infuse discipline,sports activities and he would be comfortable in unversity hostel life afterwards .




*emotional mode ON*
Mate, good luck. Your kid will have no love for you when you are old and probably put you in an old age home saying that you did not take care of him when he needed you the most.

For highlighted content.
your statement is sounds very cold.
"Yeah, we made a kid, now all we gotta do is pay for his expenses at the school and everything will be easy and set for the next 12+ years."

*Emotional mode OFF*

Then again, who am I to say. Its your kid and your decision.

Edit: You might wanna send him to Dehradun when he is in say 3rd or 4th grade. Before that, he needs your love and care.
One of my college buddies went to Boarding when he was in 1st grade. His parent didn't call him for weeks on end when he was in college. And he was okay with that. He used to *not *go back home in holidays like the rest of the kids.
But he wasn't the only kid of his parents.


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## nikhilsharma007nikx (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



Gollum said:


> *emotional mode ON*
> Mate, good luck. Your kid will have no love for you when you are old and probably put you in an old age home saying that you did not take care of him when he needed you the most.
> 
> For highlighted content.
> ...


Agreed!


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## reddick (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

[MENTION=85950]Gollum[/MENTION] 
You missed the term "including him" there.

 [MENTION=20614]Faun[/MENTION]
It only looks to you. I had already said that ...


> I am just planning about this and hav'nt send him yet. We have to scrutinize various facts before the final go. Or the idea may be dropped also.


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## Faun (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



reddick said:


> [MENTION=20614]Faun[/MENTION]
> It only looks to you. I had already said that ...



It is the time to be together. You will have enough time when he will live away from you.


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## Anorion (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

oh nothing will happen
there are still vacations, it is a great environment. @OP I suggest you take opinion from those who have gone to boarding school or those who send their children to such schools instead of those who have avoided it for whatever reason


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## Faun (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



Anorion said:


> oh nothing will happen
> there are still vacations, it is a great environment. @OP I suggest you take opinion from those who have gone to boarding school or those who send their children to such schools instead of those who have avoided it for whatever reason



4 years.


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## Gollum (Aug 20, 2015)

**www.digit.in/forum/fight-club/193276-boarding-school-pros-cons.html*



reddick said:


> [MENTION=85950]Gollum[/MENTION]
> You missed the term "including him" there.
> 
> [MENTION=20614]Faun[/MENTION]
> It only looks to you. I had already said that ...



oh I got it now. when someone is so bad at parenting the kids are better off living away . my bad I misunderstood


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## Anorion (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

all fear. there are so many kids going to boarding school, it's funny to think they lost affection for their parents. Staying with your parents 24x7 is no guarantee of affection. At this rate Im surprised mothers actually cut off the umbilical cord. Why is affection important here anyway. It's just people have been saying these things, don't separate young child from mother and kid will become distant and some emotional things I cannot even comprehend. It starts there, but seen where it ends also. The typical indian child-parent relationship is completely dysfunctional with warped understandings of simple things like "trust" and "obedience" (mostly confusing one for the other). 

boarding school is a great environment for children to learn many kinds of skills. Techniques used there are not used in day schools. It is a good opportunity, and OP if you choose to not send your child to boarding school, at least find a good reason and something sensible instead of a nebulous "omg don't abandon babby"


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## Faun (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



Anorion said:


> all fear. there are so many kids going to boarding school, it's funny to think they lost affection for their parents. Staying with your parents 24x7 is no guarantee of affection. At this rate Im surprised mothers actually cut off the umbilical cord. Why is affection important here anyway. It's just people have been saying these things, don't separate young child from mother and kid will become distant and some emotional things I cannot even comprehend. It starts there, but seen where it ends also. The typical indian child-parent relationship is completely dysfunctional with warped understandings of simple things like "trust" and "obedience" (mostly confusing one for the other).
> 
> boarding school is a great environment for children to learn many kinds of skills. Techniques used there are not used in day schools. It is a good opportunity, and OP if you choose to not send your child to boarding school, at least find a good reason and something sensible instead of a nebulous "omg don't abandon babby"



All these skills you talk about can be learned when he can go around the block and come back without getting lost, i.e., at an age when he is aware of stuff happening around.


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## Nerevarine (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

my moral compass is confused

I dont see anything wrong with what OP is doing but then again, if I was a father, id never do this to my kid.. 
I dont even know how to reply but my only advice is :
Send him to a "good" school, not necessarily a boarding school..


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## reddick (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

I've already said that the matter is under consideration. But majority of members thought that I'd already sent him. 
I'll keep in mind the 'the good school' theory. 

Secondly, the discussion has gone Off-Topic many a times and I request the Mods that please lock this thread  
This may prevent further misunderstanding between what has been asked and the given replies.


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## Anorion (Aug 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

^yes op, first deleted all comments, but there were too many. Will move off topic posts.


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## Vyom (Aug 22, 2015)

Deleting posts isn't a solution.

Let the OP decide what he wants to do. Atleast he's asking for advice, rather than doing whatever is on his mind.

While I too think that 4 year is too early for him to go live with strangers and that, that shouldn't be the case if there are other alternatives, we have to understand that OP might have some other priorities in life. I also do agree with some of the points mentioned by Anorion about the "Indian mentality", though do hope that he can atleast 'be in touch' with him should he decide to send him off to boarding school.

So, OP: Its better to google this and find opinions of parents who have send their kids to boarding, rather than take advice from us, who have no exposure like such.

(At this point, I keep remembering "Tare Zameen Par". Oh dear, didn't use to take myself too emo.)


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## Nerevarine (Aug 22, 2015)

@OP, so what did you decide ? Any specific boarding school in mind ? Id like to know too


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## Dr. House (Aug 23, 2015)

I'm against sending a kid of such age to send boarding school. He will never ever value you as father as a normal kid. Psychology of such students who sent at such age is very different from normal kids, with less family values and more immorality in their lifestyle.


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## kunalgujarathi (Aug 23, 2015)

I was put in boarding from 3rd standard.

That should be minimum possible barrier.

Ideal recommended school year is 7th.

Values,respect all that don't matter if you are fed with right qualities,ethics.

I being brought up in Joint Family never felt disrespect for anyone.Even my step mother.

If OP wants to enroll his/her child for overall development I would recommend it at 7th to 9th.
Probably where is good discipline and sports.

At a age of 4th year it's an unworthy decision.

**Boarding teaches you to adjust in your life**

Careful OP and All the Best!


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## axes2t2 (Aug 23, 2015)

TDF is filled with guys who stay at home all day,play games and watch anime.

What do you expect their opinion will be ?

So quick to pass judgement like bad parenting,mental and emotional state etc etc

OP do what you want.

Boarding school is fine.Just make sure the place gives a little bit more importance to sports related stuff.


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## kunalgujarathi (Aug 23, 2015)

axes2t2 said:


> TDF is filled with guys who stay at home all day,play games and watch anime.
> 
> What do you expect their opinion will be ?
> 
> ...



+1 Sports + Discipline.

You do want a strict school


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## Dr. House (Aug 23, 2015)

axes2t2 said:


> TDF is filled with guys who stay at home all day,play games and watch anime.
> 
> What do you expect their opinion will be ?
> 
> ...



Well you're very judgmental and seems to be an unworthy person. I am certified doctor, humanitarian activist, child rights supporter and did internship in psychiatry and pediatrics department of multi-specialty hospital as well. Age of 4 is very low for a boarding school. Many of 4 years can not even speak, sit and eat properly. 
_Mothercare is essential part of life. It is the best boarding school for him_. At least student should be 10-12 for a boarding school.


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## powerhoney (Aug 23, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



Anorion said:


> oh nothing will happen
> there are still vacations, it is a great environment. @OP I suggest you take opinion from those who have gone to boarding school or those who send their children to such schools instead of those who have avoided it for whatever reason



Only piece of logical advice in this thread... 

 [MENTION=1512]reddick[/MENTION]

Just ignore the advice of the other people who have no experience of Boarding Schools and send your kid to Mayo College when he is eligible to be admitted there... I think they take kids starting from around 8/9 year olds...  One of the best in the country!!!
Trust me, when he graduates from Mayo, he'll be more of a man than most people that you usually see around you...


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## axes2t2 (Aug 23, 2015)

Dr. House said:


> Well you're very judgmental and seems to be an unworthy person. I am certified doctor, humanitarian activist, child rights supporter and did internship in psychiatry and pediatrics department of multi-specialty hospital as well. Age of 4 is very low for a boarding school. Many of 4 years can not even speak, sit and eat properly.
> _*Mothercare* is essential part of life. It is the best boarding school for him_. At least student should be 10-12 for a boarding school.



And what about fathercare? That's not important ?

They didn't teach you that while you were getting your certificates ?


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## powerhoney (Aug 23, 2015)

Dr. House said:


> Well you're very judgmental and seems to be an unworthy person. I am certified doctor, humanitarian activist, child rights supporter and did internship in psychiatry and pediatrics department of multi-specialty hospital as well. Age of 4 is very low for a boarding school. Many of 4 years can not even speak, sit and eat properly.
> _Mothercare is essential part of life. It is the best boarding school for him_. At least student should be 10-12 for a boarding school.



+1000 to this post too...

@OP

Send your Kid to Mayo when he is around 9 or 10...


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## Dr. House (Aug 23, 2015)

axes2t2 said:


> And what about fathercare? That's not important ?
> 
> They didn't teach you that while you were getting your certificates ?



There is no so such word as 'fathercare' in any dictionary. Kindly first learn English and then argue with a professional person. Caring by father is important as well. But mothercare is more important than that because *fathers don't give birth*. As mother it's her natural duty to take care since infant period by giving immunity (IgG) through milk to all taking care, teaching basics to manners and etiquettes. Usually fathers are less sincere in taking care because of very low progesterone and other hormones, but again that is also a stereotype. Many of developed countries have concept of househusand, gay marriages and single fathers. Practically in our India mothers do take care of children from food and nutrition to medical checkups. Hope you understand and argue somewhere else where you got logical points.
Sayonara!


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## Faun (Aug 23, 2015)

axes2t2 said:


> OP do what you want.



4 years old. Added age for more context.

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powerhoney said:


> Trust me, when he graduates from Mayo, he'll be more of a man than most people that you usually see around you...



What does it mean by more man than most people ? I suppose military and sainik schools will make you a beast then ?


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## Makx (Aug 23, 2015)

Even I went to boarding in 6th class when I was 10 years old, but 4 years is too young. In boarding it is all about self study, if the student is to do good in academics.
My aunt(mother's sister) sent her older son(also 4 year old) to boarding( sherwood in Nainital) and his academic performance declined by a lot, so she got him back to home at the end of the year.
And your child might feel home sick or get bullied (not necessarily), so listen to him.


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## axes2t2 (Aug 23, 2015)

Dr. House said:


> There is no so such word as 'fathercare' in any dictionary. Kindly first learn English and then argue with a professional person. Caring by father is important as well. But mothercare is more important than that because *fathers don't give birth*. As mother it's her natural duty to take care since infant period by giving immunity (IgG) through milk to all taking care, teaching basics to manners and etiquettes. Usually fathers are less sincere in taking care because of very low progesterone and other hormones, but again that is also a stereotype. Many of developed countries have concept of househusand, gay marriages and single fathers. Practically in our India mothers do take care of children from food and nutrition to medical checkups. Hope you understand and argue somewhere else where you got logical points.
> Sayonara!



And where does the sperm come from ?

- - - Updated - - -
 @reddick

Talked to your wife about this ?


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## reddick (Aug 23, 2015)

Yeah and she insisted that we should send him when he would be of 6 yrs. The point suits me well and now I'm inquiring for reputated boarding schools.


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## nikhilsharma007nikx (Aug 23, 2015)

Where are you from? Specific city.


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## axes2t2 (Aug 23, 2015)

reddick said:


> Yeah and she insisted that we should send him when he would be of 6 yrs. The point suits me well and now I'm inquiring for reputated boarding schools.



All the best.

Visit the school before making the decision if possible.


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## reddick (Aug 23, 2015)

I'm finding near Chandigarh, Mohali , Pinjore and Panchkula .


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## powerhoney (Aug 24, 2015)

reddick said:


> I'm finding near Chandigarh, Mohali , Pinjore and Panchkula .


You considering Mayo College???


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## reddick (Aug 24, 2015)

Mayo ... Is it in Rajasthan , if yes, then no


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## mikael_schiffer (Sep 3, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

Boarding school for a 4yr old ??

Why dont you just send him to a friggin orphanage.


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## TechGuru (Sep 11, 2015)

Hello friends, 

   Did you heard about this boarding school in India. I heard Taurian World School is India's top 10 boarding school. Please check the below description. 

Spread across 65 acres of lush green undulating land, amidst natural valleys, the Taurian World School at Ranchi, India, has been designed as a premier educational institute that promotes the holistic development of students. Based on a dream to create an ideal 'educational environment' and to redefine 'learning' in terms of facility and ambience, the school uses an innovative spatial palette with high-level technology and superior quality materials.

Taurian


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## Skyh3ck (Sep 14, 2015)

I have two kids, one 8 year old son and 4 year old daughter, both are doing ok with school, i dont expect them to be IIT's or IIM's in future, they are in normal school, Me and my wife both works and are almost out for all day. We get only 1 to face each in a day, on sunday we are together.

Now we thought many times to put kids in boarding school, but then i looked back at my childhood, the memories i have with my parents, my neighbors are price less, no matter what i will not put my kids in boarding school, unless until in extreme condition or if its unavoidable.

I am not against of boarding school, we indians since ancient time send kids in Guru Kool, to learn, so its not new, but that was good old time, when people were good, and kids were sent at around 12 year of age, but now we dont know what happens in those school, a child feel safe when he or she see their parents everyday.

good luck and hoping good for your kid and you


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## quicky008 (Sep 16, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



mikael_schiffer said:


> Boarding school for a 4yr old ??
> 
> Why dont you just send him to a friggin orphanage.


well said.


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## bssunilreddy (Sep 16, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



mikael_schiffer said:


> Boarding school for a 4yr old ??
> 
> Why dont you just send him to a friggin orphanage.



Superbly said beta...


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## TechnoBOY (Sep 20, 2015)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*



mikael_schiffer said:


> Boarding school for a 4yr old ??
> 
> Why dont you just send him to a friggin orphanage.


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## Whistler81 (Oct 4, 2015)

[MENTION=1512]reddick[/MENTION] to answer your question. I will recommend you send your son to St. Michael's School Siliguri, West Bengal. I have spent the best years of my life in this school. The best part of this schools is most of the teachers who teach stay in the school itself and therefore there are always plenty of them around. The food is really good. They have tremendous board exam results, you will see that in the website. They have the best football team in the region. Quiz, Elocution, clubs plenty of extracurricular activities. Please watch out this is not a five star school like Pailan and Goekna and the rest. This is a real simple but hell of a school. Mostly Christan and Anglo-Indian teachers so English is top notch. Now since your son is 4 i would suggest Sun Shine School Kerseong, West Bengal. Let him do his lower level classes there then bring him down to Siliguri. Understand I am only suggesting schools where I have studied and can vouch for. This school has boarding facility for students from nursery onward. Mostly lady teachers who are very kind and loving. Plenty of additional helpers, medical staff and plenty of games time. This school is located in the hills of Kerseong/Darjeeling so the weather is absolutely fantastic. I support your decision to send your child off to boarding so early on. I thank my parents for doing the same for me.

Yes, boarding school life is hard when problems come, when your shoes are not polished or your nails are long and there is an inspection, but they teach you to be self dependent. Plenty of other life lessons can be inculcated. Day scholar schools have too much nonsense going around. Boarding life is simple, studies, games, food and sleep. I'll tell you, these schools have it "figured out" how to raise a child. There are no unnecessary rules that create problems, very simple lifestyle. You son will like it. If you want to know further feel free to contact me. There are a lot of people judging you for your decision i want to say to them you really shouldn't because you don't know how awesome boarding school life is. You make friends for life.

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Dr. House said:


> I'm against sending a kid of such age to send boarding school. He will never ever value you as father as a normal kid. Psychology of such students who sent at such age is very different from normal kids, with less family values and more immorality in their lifestyle.



says who ?


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## reddick (Oct 8, 2015)

Bro , I'm from Punjab and West Bengal is too far to send him.
He will be admitted when he would be 6 yrs. or more 
Thanks anyways for your support


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## ranjan82 (Jul 15, 2016)

*Re: Boarding School in North India*

I think the pros are: at the top schools, it's a secondary school education second to none.  Your kid will learn a lot in the classroom, but will also learn self-reliance, ethics and personal responsibility.  They will be tremendously prepared for college, especially in terms of writing skills.  The friends they go through school with will be their best friends for the rest of their life.  It is challenging and can be incredibly fun, and at certain moments at my school the setting inspired a magical je ne sais quoi that was profoundly moving.

The cons are: it's not for everyone.  Some of the pressures to succeed, do well in classes, look good, etc. can get intense, and there's a set of kids that really struggle and have an unpleasant time.  Kids grow up pretty fast, and use of alcohol, adderall, and harder substances is common.  If they have extra-curricular interests beyond what the school offers, they are generally out of luck.  It costs a lot of money, although financial aid at some schools is getting up to par with that of elite colleges.  I also wouldn't recommend it to parents who want to be intimately involved in the details of their child's life, as it will be frustrating for both parties.

If the parents and child are prepared for what boarding school entails, I would strongly recommend it.


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